I'm lucky. I have a village that helps me take care of her. I have friends that take her and care for her, and if we're honest, better than I would if it was me who was home. I just don't do well when she's sick much less sick for this long. There are some people on this earth who are made to care for sick kids and people in general, come to find out I'm not one of those people. Instead, I am one who has an agenda that I like to accomplish everyday. When I can't accomplish those tasks I get irritated and it has nothing to do with her, it's my personality. But more important right now is that she's sick and I'm stuck.
I'll admit it, the last week has been rough. My little one has been sick - running a fever and then starting to cough. I thought she was over it so I let her play all weekend and wound up coming back with a fever yesterday. This is when single parenting sucks. I'll be honest, it really and truly does. I can't take leave or I won't get paid and I'm not in a position where I can afford to not get paid. I have no other income at this point and I have no partner to stay with her. So what do I do?
This is those times that a partner can make all the difference in the world. These are the times where being a single parent is just hard, especially when you live outside the home. There's nothing you can do but wait on your child to feel better. There's nothing you can do but wait and pray you're doing what's best for your kid. That's the only choice you have. But you always wonder if it's the best choice and if there was anything else you could do. You will always second guess yourself and wonder - what if?
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